Aslm! I came to like this man since I'm 15 SS 1, and by then I don't even know what that means, I just want to be listening to him always and want him to be talked about all the time, we have something in common i.e one letter we cannot pronounce and that's what makes me start to like him at first, this silently start to affect my heart, mark u I don't even know him is just his voice I always listen to because of that letter he cannot pronounce too, before I feel very sad wen my friends/relatives said pronounce this letter let's hear a kind of joke, but after coming to know that he too cannot pronounce it then I started to like mine too, After my graduation from Sec Sch then I start to know what my feelings means and suddenly that already affect me, I started to investigate on him and anything about him, finally I almost get to know 60% of everything about him, my family knows I love him, my friends and everyone besides me know I love him, at first they all reject that cause he multiply my ages and he has two wives but coming to know and understand how deep I love him, everyone agrees to that, prayers, recitations, charity, fasting, and istikhara, I have done all and I'm currently on it continuesly, I. found his nom and contacted him as my sister that me her sister loves him for d past 5 years and he said she should send her pic for her, I sent d pic he haven't responded and I deleted it for all so he didn't saw d pics, I sent another video of my self with facemask he saw this one but replied with I love her for the one she loves me because I. e Allah, then nothing again, WALLAHIL AZIM I don't know why I love him and I don't know how to stop loving him if to calculate the years I spent with him in my mind are 7 years, I'm a Nurse and presently working in one hospital, I'm 22years now I can't give any man chance cause I love I person, even if I try to I fear one thing that after marriage I cannot stop my self from following and liking his pages as well listening to him, as such this could actually affect my marriage islamically and my husband too will find out cause everyone around me knows this already, I cried, cried and cried, as I'm telling u this now I already star to manifest some symptoms of depression I'm afraid I will be a victim one day, I know what depression is and it's complications, sometimes I feel like I don't what to live at all it's paining seriously but with prayers Alhmdllh, Don't judge me please I'm a type of lady that hate to see her fellow woman dying for love then the table change, I don't want anything from him and I feel like I can sacrifice everything for him, I just love him and his family I'm not after everything materially. Advice me as a sister, friend and daughter please and include me in ur prayers. 😭😭🙏🙏