Advice on My Father

Assalamu Alaikum, Hope this finds you well. I need sincere advice and especially a third person's perspective to understand the predicament I'm in at the moment. Its regarding my dad. I am Male, a university student. I used to admire and respect my dad growing up wanting to be like him. He's not working in the same city we lived so sai public holidays yawanci muke ganin shi before retirement. Yanxu ya dawo da zama gida. I'm the eldest of my siblings so responsibilities fall on me and I'm also studying a good course in uni alhamdulillah. When I make mistakes, my dad shames me, calls me selfish, ba irin halin da ba a cewa banda shi. it used to bother me and I try always to improve. but there always seems to be a problem....its really hard to impress him. And I dont mind being corrected, its the constant downgrading and insult that pains me. Har ta kai ta kawo sai a hadan tarko dan nayi ba daidai ba ai ta fada. ko a ki mun magana na satuttuka. Ni kuma seeing he's my father I always try to figure out what I've done wrong, apologise sometimes even with tears. wani lokacin idan naje apology sai yanuna kamar bai San mai ya faru ba. He likes to put us including my siblings and mum in a situation he can control. ko gani yayi ka cika murmushi to ka sani ka kusa laifi. He also tries to create rifts between us siblings. I will discuss one thing with him but he will say another thing when he complains about our character. If someone outside admires our character, he'll be very quick to condemn us. It reached to a point ko muryar sa naji gabana faduwa yake. His relationship with my mum too is not ideal, haka itama ko yaushe fargaba take kar yace an mai laifi. hes isolated her from family, controls her finances and always shames her every chance he gets. da duk ban ganin haka because she tries to shield us from it but yanxu growing up I'm noticing and now my admiration for him is gone. I still love him and pray for him and always wished our relationship wasnt like this, financially he tries and provides more than enough but he also doesnt want us to be financially independent. He always frowns at my mums attempts at businesses, i hide my scholarships from him, because it would create rift between us if he knows i have a secondary source of income he cant control. The rapport i had with him when I was young I'm now discovering was just him using me to know what happens at home when he used to work. he will say things that made me doubt my mothers integrity and sense of responsibility growing up. There are details I can't say to keep this anonymous but wallahi my mum has being very patient with him. I'm now depressed with stress and anxiety both from home and school. I have a constant fear of marriage and parenthood because I dont want my wife or kids to feel this way if I ended up like him. I now avoid him except when he needs me or when I greet him and that too is becoming a problem.... I don't know what to do? Ban son shiga hakkin sa wlh coz kar na janyo fushin Allah but hes not someone you can have a conversation with and be open, everything you say can be used against you. Limiting interactions with him right now is the only way I keep my sanity. am I overreacting????