my dilemma on whom to select for marriage.
Relationship
Anonymous Sep 10, 05:10 PM

my dilemma on whom to select for marriage. 2

I'm confused between 2 guys. the first one he's well to do, works abroad (where I'm working too), religious, calm but he's not that good looking so I am not attracted to him. also we're family friends so our families kind of know about us and that's something that bothers me sometimes because I don't want a situation where things become serious with families getting involved while I am not ready yet. I clearly told him I'm not ready to take it to next step yet because I'm trying to figure out if I can develop feelings for him. He used to send me cute messages when I told him it's what I like but I find it hard reciprocating and he stopped. I feel like he needs to do these things to win me over but in his defense he said he doesn't see the point of doing it if I'm not reciprocating. so we just continue phone calls and that's all. the second guy, I'm attracted to him, he's ok too religious wise and well to do and he loves me, he's been wanting to be serious with me but I kept pushing him away and he lives in Nigeria. He told me that he's ready to settle and even a week before he sent his elders to ask for another's hand he told me if I am interested he's willing to hold off. so now Im starting to like the second guy and I feel it's late, I told him im now ready to start a relationship and he said he still loves me and will marry me when I come back to Nigeria. please advise. is it worth to wait and get married to the second guy as a second wife or try to develop feelings for the 1st guy.?
post

Replies

(20)

Ibrahim Abdu Sep 10, 06:13 PM
I think the best thing is to perform Istikhara as taught by the prophet (PBUH). Then discuss the issue with a honest and trustworthy person(s) around you for advice. May Allah grant you the best among them.
reply 2
AnDex_Blaq Sep 10, 06:55 PM
Take some time to reflect on your feelings for both guys, communicate your thoughts and concerns with them, and make a decision that aligns with your values and goals for the future. And also, looks should not be the basis for deciding a future partner. Signed: Ugly Boys Association 😌
reply 4
AnDex_Blaq Sep 10, 07:10 PM

They should allow us breath 😂😂😂😂😂😂
reply 1
Ahmad Aysha Sep 10, 07:15 PM
Just pray and try and know them better from there u will decide, I would love to be with the first guy shaa, looks does not matter, just do istikhara maybe non of them is ur husband sef
reply 0
Excuser Sep 10, 07:30 PM
marry someone that loves you. not someone you love and learn to love the person.!
reply 2
Al-ameen Abdullah Sep 10, 07:50 PM
kawai ki saurari zuciyarki wannan dake a Nigeria shikike so kuma na fahimci baki gane menene ma gundarin so basa boda idan kana son mutum baka ganin muninsa
reply 1
Ahmad Aysha Sep 10, 08:36 PM

😂😂 And worst the good-looking one will soon marry, my sister better be first.
reply 0
AnDex_Blaq Sep 10, 09:00 PM

From the look of things, the second guy is even making preparations to marry another woman.
reply 0
Ahmad Aysha Sep 10, 09:20 PM

Yes that's what she said ai, she wants to come back to Naija and be his second imagine
reply 0
AnDex_Blaq Sep 10, 09:23 PM

The choice is left for her to make, she might have more khair as a second wife to the second guy than being a first wife to the first guy, the thing is she should do Istikhara and ask for Allah’s guidance.
reply 1
Meenah2 Sep 11, 09:14 AM
Deleted

kmar an Hana aje contact fa
reply 0
Anonymous #2 Sep 11, 11:42 AM

Ok. I am sorry!
reply 0
Anonymous #2 Sep 11, 02:19 PM

Please delete your reply on the comment.
reply 0
AnDex_Blaq Sep 11, 09:44 PM

Mu unattractive guys mun shiga uku😂😂😂 Allah zai baki handsome man and a good one for that matter, Amin Thumma Amin.
reply 0
Ibrahim Abdu Sep 14, 11:12 AM

Ameen ya Allah
reply 0

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