Do I have to accept you because you repented?
Anonymous Mar 29, 04:06 PM

Do I have to accept you because you repented? 1

Here is my take... "Everyone has a past", right but... We are responsible for our past. if a man/woman committed a sin, you should absolutely not tell anyone BUT... What if someone that is serious about marriage ask? See, I've seen a lot of people (especially women) get angry whenever a man ask if a lady is a virgin. To be honest, there's a reason men asks. For example, a man stayed away from zina all his life, saved his virginity till marriage, and hoping to find the same virgin woman to marry. And then there's a woman who engaged in zina... It's not the matter of "ai she has repented" or "that was her past", yeah that's great that she has changed, Alhamdulillah... But her repentance is for disobeying Allah. Therefore, a man has absolutely no obligation to marry her just because "ai she has repented" but if he knows and he don't mind, great!. If he said no, please understand that IT IS NOT A SIN or "he is not religious". But now, if a guy is not a virgin, he engaged in zina as well, he has absolutely no right to demand to marry a virgin woman. Besides, there is a reason why in islam the dowry of a virgin is not the same as that of a nonvirgin. So why will selfish reasons allowed us to keep giving these stupidity (of people committing zina) a pass by saying "ai that was her past" or "she has repented ai"? if you don't want complications in the future then don't disobey your Lord and call it "qaddara"... We are all sinners... May Allah guide, protect, forgive, and keep us on the straight path.
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Replies

(21)
Anonymous #1 Mar 29, 04:41 PM
I know u are referring to my statements. Yes I know it hurts. But, it is what Allah destined for us. We are all sinners but it is unIslamic to disclose our past sins. Ko a hadith zaka ji "Fulani bin full (wane da wane)". Don ba'a so a bayana sunan shi da zunubin da. Kuma Annabi Muhammad (SAW) ya aure mata divorcees the widows only one virgin(duk da dalili ya aure su). You are a man, if Allah didn't bless your first wife to be a virgin but Allah can bless you with the subsequence ones. Every righteous person wants good spouses that will make him/her happy, remind him/her of Allah and go to Jannah together. We didn't come to this world to enjoy but to come to this world to worship Allah. Check suratul Jinn. Any test that Allah tested us with it, we should try our best and pass the test. Indeed Allah is with the patient ones.
reply 6
Anonymous Mar 29, 05:44 PM

Not really refering to your statement, just what I've been seeing a lot on social media. But you're right. And don't get me wrong, I said wadda tayi zina, not divorcee or widow.
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Anonymous #1 Mar 29, 06:23 PM

Ok. But, wallahi in namiji yayi zina in his past kuma ya tuba kar ya gaya min. Don ko ya fita waje ya dade I will think ko ya koma past life din shi ne. Shadan zai ta min wasi_wasi min a rai. So, it is better he shouldn't tell me.
reply 4
Anonymous Mar 29, 06:45 PM

Agreed! Ai dama both mace and namiji idan ba'a tambaya ba, toh kar a fada. The only thing is idan aka tambaya, toh kada ayi qarya
reply 1
Rabius Mar 29, 06:59 PM
zina is something that one doesn’t control by him or herself it’s a thing that comes under the influence of shaytan, no one is absolved or supernatural to avoid sins it’s by Allahs mercy that one avoid sins, he’s most merciful because we humans are always bound to sin. why would there room for repentance where sins were entirely left to a persons will? zina or any other sin comes from a conscious part of human thoughts but circumstances prevail beyond our control and we just commit . some had done zina before marriage others only start when they married. and one thing I’ve learnt is that one doesn’t absolve himself or herself from committing sin if you don’t today tomorrow you would most especially if one looks down on others as if it’s thier fault. the best thing is to pray to Allah to safeguard us from all sins
reply 4
Anonymous Mar 29, 07:42 PM

Yes we sin and we are all sinners. That's why we repent in hope for forgiveness. But there are major and minor sins. Allah SWT ordered us to stay away from the major sins (sins with specific punishments). I disagree with you for saying "zina is something that one doesn't control". Zina is a major sin (sadly people trying to normalize it) and Allah says "Walataqrabuz zina" (Don't go near zina). So people put themselves in the situation to commit zina. For example, a person goes to a club or place they sell alcohol, will that person too say it just come and I drink? similar scenario with zina. And yes, it is a person's fault if they commit sin (they will be punish if they don't repent). I agreed we keep praying for Allah's protection against major and minor sins
reply 1
Anonymous #2 Mar 30, 04:05 AM
exactly bro ,that’s what my bf told me ,he seek for permission bf asking .first plz don’t take it personally I said okay then ,he asked are you a virgin I be like 🙄, he said I’m asking and I told him the truth. he said the reason he asked was, if he’s gonna spend his life protecting himself from zina ,then he want to deserve a virgin to ,bt if he asked you and you tell him the truth uh ain’t ,he will decide if he can still stay with uh ,trust you and so on ,but if he can’t then Daz the end of discussion ,but uh lie and he find the truth he said wlh she will never be happy with him and he won’t respect her anymore .or trust her again Bcs he can’t find peace with her so I agree with 100%
reply 1
Anonymous #3 Mar 30, 05:45 AM
personally, I’m of the opinion of not asking. akwai maganganu akai… a sharia ma it’s not considered an appropriate question ka tambayi mutum irin sabon Allah da sukayi a baya. We’re not Christian’s that need to confess our sins in other to get them forgiven. with that being said, ai ra’ayi ne weather you choose to accept someone with a past or not. While it might not be islamically correct to ask or judge such, it’s worse to marry someone and treat them without respect or dignity. everyone has their baggage, and the best of people are those who conceal other people’s secret mistakes or sin. Allah ya sa mu dace
reply 2
Abdulkarim Badamasi Mar 30, 05:50 AM
the second thing is, you think people choose to disobey Allah. kasan idan kayi wa mutum Gori a Kan zunubi saboda baka taba aikatawa ba… tohh, kada Allah ya jarrabe ka da irin abinda ya jarrabe su da shi. Humans are created weak, idan kai kana tunanin akwai abinda bazaka iya ba… tohh, kana tuna cewa Allah ne ya ceceka. Allah ne ke shiryarwa
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Anonymous Mar 30, 06:23 AM

Oga sir, yes people chose to disobey Allah. Babu qaddara a sabawa Allah. kafin mutun ya aikata major sin, sai anbi matakai kafin a aikata. Ba gori bane sir, kawai yadda naga wasu mata sun maida abun cewa idan mutun shi ya tsare kansa and yace bazai auri wadda ta taba zina ba, kamar mutun yayi laifi. Ni kawai inaso a gane raayin mutun ne a wannan yanayin. Idan yace bazai iya ba toh beyi lefi ba. And gaskia dama komai da taimakon Allah ne, shi yasa kullun yanada kyau a dunga neman tsari daga major sins. Allah kare mu, ya qara shirya mu
reply 2
Anonymous #4 Mar 30, 09:55 AM
You captured everything, I pray zasu ji da kunen basira
reply 1
Anonymous #4 Mar 30, 10:06 AM

Please don't say a sharia ma when you don't have the adequate knowledge of the Shari'a. One of the cardinal pillar of neman Aure a Musulunci akwai bincike.
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Anonymous #1 Mar 30, 11:47 AM

Bincike a muslinci bawai kaje ka tambaita zunubi tayi ba. Zaka je ka tambai people around ne. Wanda suka Santa da family ta. Bincike aure is a most. I'm very good bincike for others in an zo maganan aure but bana ce ma mutum ya tambai mutum akan past zunibin shi.
reply 0
Hyghdqr Mar 30, 06:37 PM

asking is really good mer/sir
reply 1
Hyghdqr Mar 30, 06:47 PM

sir/ma binciken mutum ya xamo dole daga gareshi ake tmby saboda there's a secret a wayanta/shi and the guy is just trying to educate people about this most of females gender arr taking the risk of doing zina and when it comes to marriage sai kawai suce just 4get her past and the most female saying that are in the same shoe ya kamata a sanarda wannan gaskiya saboda a social media yanxu na jima banga female gender wacca ta goyi bayan a binciki mace kafin a aureta saboda they have bad past
reply 1
Hyghdqr Mar 30, 06:56 PM
absolutely right exactly what is in my mind 💯
reply 1
Anonymous #4 Mar 31, 10:22 PM

And they're always complaining about why they're staying longer in their father's house. You've to come clean to a guy for him to trust you, duk in da naga kina boye boye dole na gudu, because same boye boye za'a cigaba even after the wedding. We have seen scenarios of girls still engaging in sexual activities with their ex's even after marriage.
reply 1

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