Sometimes I wonder if certain things happen for a reason or we are just facing the consequences of our actions... I am a 25 year old lady who life is currently dealing with(relationship wise), Well here is the story. I was supposed to get married this year but then I don't think that will be happening anymore. Before all this drama I have been unlucky in relationships there was always something wrong with the relationship or he was one of those guys who wanted something else... ps I've made my own fare share of mistakes too but I've learnt from them... fast forward to the present I'm not sure if it was love I felt for this person or if I mistake the feelings I had for love or if I was just desperate to be in a relationship like everyone else at the time. I was going through a though time few years back and he was just there for me and then we got close and started a relationship again( I've know him before and at that time he was not someone I wanted to date at all) this time it was different and well not bad but I didn't know if it was love or not but I went ahead with the relationship. 2 years later he wanted us to get married and I was okay with it even though it didn't feel like a good or bad idea I was just there feeling plenty things at once... I sha wanted to get married so... they came to fix date and all that and for some reasons it got postponed twice now I am very i don't want to get married but families are now involved by the way this person has previous issues attached to cheating, lies and lacks boundaries with other women and is generally insecure about my friendships outside the relationship.However, he has begged and apologized severally and says he has Changed but I can't get over the fact that he did all those things and I doubt him all the time... I once cheated in the relationship and I didn't lie about it and he forgave my own mistake. but even after I still moved on and looked past all this he still does it again and still begged when I found out. But all this cheating and lying aside he loves me and tries to make me happy even when I'm not being so nice...Does this make me a bad person that I am unable to let go and trust him again? Anyway I have decided to not go ahead with the marriage because I feel I might regret my decision also because I don't think I love this person enough to want to get into something as serious as marriage but then all these thoughts and feelings are not going away even after I have prayed. So do I over look all the flaws and mistakes in the relationship and focus on the love he has for me and maybe I might be able to reciprocate after marriage or not but if you are in my shoes will you proceed with all these or just move on???