do u think i should tell him about my health issues?
Relationship
Anonymous Dec 22, 07:15 PM

do u think i should tell him about my health issues? 0

I am hiv positive and we have been dating with my boyfriend over 6years he loves me soo much and I love him too and ryt nw he is talking about or marriage I don't know what to do pls advice me should I tell him the condition of me
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Replies

(18)

Anonymous #2 Dec 22, 07:23 PM
You should have told him since, do the right thing and don't cheat him in this way
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Sgabdo Dec 22, 09:34 PM
Even If You Don't Tell Him Now.. he will eventually Find Out... And He Will Hate You For Hiding that From Him... Talk less Giving Him HIV. Bcs We All Nows that Is What is Going to Happened
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Anonymous Dec 23, 06:01 AM

ur right even I really want to but am scared although I didn't get it from a bad way but from blood transfusion since. when am In primarily 5 ,. from the time I have the sense of my self knowing my situation and knowing y I have been swallowing a drug for years asking my mom is for what but refuses telling .me but she just use to say u are not feeling fyn realising the truth when I have grown enough to know my status this have been the worst part of my life it makes me crazy sometimes I feel like the world have nothing for me anymore but I promise I won't cheat on anyone I will tell him everything even if it takes him to hate me
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Deejangala Dec 23, 10:32 AM
He'll eventually find out when you go for premarital tests, it's better you let him know before then.
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Boubar Dec 23, 01:22 PM
You need to disclose your status to him. And, if you are on your meds and been adhering, you should now be at undetectable status and you can't transmit the virus to anybody even through unprotected intimacy. There are many discordant couples out there (one spouse HIV positive and the other not) and if you tell him and he can marry you like that, you need to take him to the clinic you are getting your meds for a more elaborate explanation and enlightenment. Gone are the days when HIV is a killer disease, people live healthy and normal life when they take their meds correctly and consistently.
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Anonymous #3 Dec 23, 06:03 PM
Gsky shawara da zan baki karma ki gaya masa halin da kike ciki don ba lalle ya rike sirri ba. Kawai ki nuna bakida interest akan shi, bazaki aure shi ba. Akwai group a facebook da ake matchmaking se ki tura details dinki ko Allah zesa a samu wani me HIV din, kawai kuyi auren ku asiri a rufe!
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Sgabdo Dec 23, 06:29 PM

i am Sorry Sister You Have A Greatest Test... Allah ya baki Ikon Ci...gaskia You btr tell him the Truth..sorry. Allah yasa Ya Fahince Ki
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Nana zainab Dec 23, 10:54 PM
You should let him knw gskia,relationship ana building dinsa a trust ne,idan baki Fada masa ba yyi finding out a wani waje zargi zai shiga tsakaninku,better let him know kawai
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Anonymous #1 Dec 27, 12:47 PM

Please before you proceed to inform, know the kind of person he is. I know you said you've been together for 6 years. But not everyone can take that news. No matter how much he loves you if he is not properly informed on the matter, he can end it. You need to know if he is an open minded person and has a certain level of exposure and can look at things with understand eyes. Not everyone can agree to be serodiscordant couple. If there's a way you can indirectly get to know what he thinks about the whole issue. It doesn't have to be instant. You can be bringing up the topic at certain times or something related to the topic. That way you can have an idea of how he will take the news and 8f there's a chance he will accept. Cos if you should inform him and things don't go how it's desired, it's liable to break you. Kuma magana ta riga ta fita, no taking it back. You can be shattered and scarred. Though guys are logical beings than ladies are. But even at that, he can choose to refuse to be with you despite all the love he has for you. He'll probably be thinking of unfortunate turn of events in the future even though by now it is expected that your viral load should be reading undetectable. So have an idea on his view on the subject matter before informing him. But it's better to let him know. Even if you successfully marry each other and he later finds out, it might not be funny at all and he could sue. May Allah make it easy for you. Allah ya baki ikon cin jarabawar ki
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Zash Dec 28, 10:09 AM
This is a very crucial issue, you’re supposed to tell him from the very start
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Uncletee Dec 31, 01:12 PM

maybe she never knew the relationship will go this far...you cant just go about telling every man that approach u that u are hiv positive
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Anonymous #4 Dec 31, 01:16 PM
my advice is, have a heart to heart conversation with him..the only problem i have is if he is not matured to hold ur secret...your hiv status should not be a public knowledge. it's for you and the person you are gettng married to. you can start by telling hm you have viral hepatitis. and see how he will react before telling him about ur hiv status
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Anonymous Jan 4, 02:42 PM

thanks so much u really said alot and am really comfortable with ur advice I will insha Allah I will find a better way to indirectly talk about the issue thanks
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Anonymous #1 Jan 16, 05:37 PM

Masha Allah, I'm glad I was of little help. Please be smart and cautious while you're at it.
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Anonymous Jan 19, 04:20 PM

I have finally did it I told him everything he was shocked and confused y dauka miji aka mun nake mai karya but I explained to him I told him everything he feel sorry for me and. said he won't leavee me I know he made the decision out of pity am so sorry for him he cried out of tears I broke his heart but since then he did not call me I texted him but no reply am not angry with him he has all the ryt to do that but am tired my heart is in pain I feel like no one will love me again I can't stop my tears I really can't 😭😭😭😭😭😭
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Anonymous #1 Jan 26, 10:28 PM

Subhanallah. Take it easy sister. Sorry it took me a while to come here. But I hope you're doing better now. And I hope he has responded and it's a positive response. It'll take him a while to be able to process it all. If he is an understanding person and Allah has blessed him with open mindedness, I'm sure he will ponder over it snd decide what's best. What ever his decision is will be the right one. And I'm so glad the way you handled it. You weren't angry about it. That shows that you're a nice person too. And the fact that you wished not to hide it from him is also proof of that. Just keep praying for the best. I hope he doesn't mistakenly let it out while trying to seek for advice and guidance on what to do. Cos if he is not so enlightened, he could try to get help from people around him.
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Anonymous #1 Jan 26, 10:43 PM

Though I don't know how you broke the news to him but I hope he tries to research on the subject matter before he makes his final decision of whether to continue or let go. Cos it's a delicate matter. If he truly loves you and wishes to spend the rest if his life with you, he will be so confused on what to do, and could make the wrong decision. He could let go of an amazing wife cos of fear of what could happen in the future, but won't be his fault. That's why he needs to be enlightened, if you're worth it, zai iya rufe ido and accept you whole heartedly But I pray whatever happens, it should be for the best to both of you In-sha-Allah. In case you wish to talk, alphadahpla@gmail.com And above all, ki dogara ga Allah and don't lose hope. Everything happens for a reason and he knows best. Maganar cewa no one will love you again is just your heart hurting and you feel cos of your condition you won't find love again. But Allah bazai bar ki haka ba In-sha-Allahu. Jarabawar ki ce haka, Allah ya baki ikon cin jarabawar.
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